Meet Heather {Miss October}

October 7, 2013

In my ever so humble opinion, the best show that has ever graced my television is Monk. If you don’t know what Monk is, we can’t be friends. (Just kidding!) But here’s a brief rundown of the show for you (and don’t worry, I promise this has a point! Don’t run away!) Monk was a show about an ex-police officer, Adrian Monk. Mr. Monk lost his wife, Trudy, in a car-bombing. He was already clinically OCD and a little odd, but the loss of his wife made those OCD tendencies escalate into deep-rooted fears and phobias that were detrimental to his life for many years, even costing him his job. However, with the help of some colorful characters, he hones in on his OCD and phobias, and in turn uses them to be pretty much the best detective ever. He was faced with a decision: be defined by his fears, or move past them and do what he was meant to do.

I identify with Mr. Monk a lot. I’m not OCD. I’m not scared of milk (most of the time…), or shaking people’s hands, or using public restrooms. But I do face a lot of fears, and most of the time, they are pretty irrational ones to boot.
I’m scared of getting anywhere late, so I usually arrive before the event has even started and sit anxiously in my car for twenty minutes. I’m scared to make decisions – anything from where to eat or what movie to watch, to what to get someone for their birthday. I’m really scared of interacting with people I don’t know very well (excluding social media.) I’m terrified that I am doing a sub-par job in the classroom. I have gotten so overwhelmed by being in a crowd that I had a panic attack and had to go sit in the bathroom for thirty minutes. And you know what it all boils down to?

I’m afraid of what people think of me. Isn’t that ridiculous? I know it’s crazy in my head, but those overwhelming fears just tackle me head on. And by acting out on those fears, I become like Monk. I am defined by them. And that isn’t right.

Especially when the Bible tells us, “For God gave us not a spirit of fear, but of power and love and self control.” – 2 Timothy 1:7

Uh, hello conviction! My fear is NOT from God! It’s allowing the devil to take hold of my life and steer me whichever direction he wants me to go! But what would my life look like if I said no to a spirit of fear? It would be one of power and love and self-control – all things that, through Christ, can tackle fear head-on! I can move past my fears and do what I was meant to do.

Does that mean that every day I wake up and say to myself, “Man, I sure do love people! I know they all love me and I love them and life is a bowl of cherries and golly, Heather, you’re just going to have the best day ever.” Not in the least! I wake up scared, and I acknowledge that I am scared, and I ask God for the confidence and power to crush those fears. When I do, I generally have a great day. When I don’t, I let my fears run all over me.

I wasn’t made to live in fear. Mr. Monk wasn’t made to be defined by his phobias – he was made to be San Francisco’s best detective. And I was made to teach and be a vessel of the Lord.

So next time you see are feeling an overwhelming sense of fear, remember that that is not who you were made to be. Your spirit is one of power, not fear, and that, my friends, is a pretty wonderful truth to hold on to!


heatherHeather blogs over at Soliloquies and Sass. She is an avid lover of theatre, and loves to preform on stage as well as support the local arts as an audience member. She is currently in her final semester of college, and is spending it student-teaching a group of fun and curious fourth graders. In her spare time, you’ll find her reading a good mystery or fantasy novel, drinking coffee by the gallon, and snuggling up with her cats. Her favorite Bible verse is Psalm 107:9.

Nickolee October 7, 2013 at 8:29 am

loved it.
great post and I do understand about being scared of what people think…it’s crazy how deep rooted that that one fear can go – it ends up being the reason for SO many other fears or indecisions! Praise the Lord we have victory over it!!

Claire October 9, 2013 at 4:19 pm

I love Monk!!! Glad someone else appreciates as well. I love how you related that to what we were made to do. 🙂

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